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September 2011 The Great Outdoors
For the birds
Featherbrained conspiracy theories abound;
freezing blocks of suet makes feeding easy
 by Jack Spaulding
Outdoors Writer
I guess as long as there have been governments, there have been conspiracy theories. Maybe, rightfully so.
But there are times when someone comes up with a “totally confirmed” previously undisclosed government collusion so preposterous, it is down right funny. These wild rumors even go as far as to implicate our benign natural resources department. The Indiana DNR, too, falls prey to the rumor mill on a regular basis.
A couple weeks ago, a good friend of mine called me to inquire about a “hush-hush” DNR operation taking place in the Brown County State Park area. Why he would think I would be in the loop of state government’s dark secrecy, I have no idea. Maybe it is because I hang out in the outdoors, have the stock ethics of a hunting and fishing writer, and I look a little shifty.
Anyway … he had been told about a reintroduction project by his son-in-law, who heard from a friend, who knew a government secretary, who knows an informant inside the DNR, who confirmed the DNR was involved in a clandestine operation in Southern Indiana. It seems the DNR was using black helicopters at night to stock more turkeys in the park area to control the alarming increase of rattlesnakes.
Actually, some of the individual particulars of the story have a basis in truth, but whoever put the pieces together got it all wrong.
First, let’s get the black helicopter into proper focus. Federal Drug Enforcement Administration agents, state police and conservation officers do use government helicopters. Some of them are black. They use helicopters to look for patches of illegally-grown marijuana. When the agents and enforcement officers spot what may be a patch of illicit weed, they hover down as low as possible for safe flying and use binoculars to try identifying the plants as being of the illegal, Cheech-and-Chong variety. However, the DNR does not use helicopters to stock turkeys (which we have plenty of), and the enforcement guys don’t fly at night looking for dope.
Now the part about the turkeys … Yes, the DNR has stocked turkeys across the state for years, but the program for transplanting turkeys into new habitat ended several years ago. I think the last two counties receiving wild turkey transplants were Rush and Shelby back in the late 1990s. I remember the Rush County release very well, as the Fish & Wildlife guys released the turkeys about an eighth of a mile due south of my house. I might also mention they forgot to tell me until several weeks after the fact. My neighbor, Richard Mahan got to help. He said it was great.
Now the good part … What about the snakes?
Brown County — including the park area — contains some of the biggest timber rattlesnakes you can imagine, and the DNR and a couple of the universities are keeping track of them. The park has documented about 115 of the rare snakes, with some of the snakes reaching 6 feet in length. Chance encounters are rare, and no one has been bitten in the park in the past 30 years.
As for an interaction between the turkeys and the rattlesnakes … I doubt if rattlesnakes make up much of a wild turkey’s forage base. I imagine a wild turkey likes to bite something good that doesn’t bite back. Worms? Yes! Venomous snakes … probably not so much.
Even with education and our state government encouraging public awareness, the outdoor rumor mill continues to roll along. Variations I have heard of the black-ops helicopter stocking stories also have our Indiana DNR introducing coyotes, red wolves, wild hogs and rattlesnakes.
Sometimes, I wonder if the stories get started by the guys hanging out in those Cheech and Chong gardens? Well, I have to go … I hear a helicopter over the woods out back. I’m going to get my binoculars and check it out!
Suet-sicles make the feeding easy
I feed the wild birds year-round in my backyard. Twelve months a year from dawn to dusk, I have more hungry feathered friends than you can shake a stick at clamoring around the sunflower feeder and pecking at the suet blocks.
I keep the suet blocks out for the woodpeckers. Downy woodpeckers, red-bellied woodpeckers, red-headed woodpeckers and even the king-size Pileated woodpeckers hammer away at the seed in the suet cakes.
Loading the suet cakes in the winter is OK, but in the summer and early fall, it is not an enjoyable task. With the heat in the interior of the garage hitting 95-100 F a lot of days, the suet cakes turn to a consistency similar to old sugar cream pie. When the cakes are all ooey and gooey, loading the suet cake dispenser gets to be a nasty chore and makes a mess out of the hands and door knobs.
One day while preparing to fill the feeders, I walked past the deep freeze and suddenly realized … if I chilled the suet cakes, they would be much easier to handle. Bingo. It works like a charm. No more gooey fingers! A couple hours in the freezer, and they are good to go.
The only downside is a super cold suet cake makes the woodpeckers a little hesitant a first, but they quickly adapt and hammer away.
till next time,
Jack Spaulding is a state outdoors writer and a consumer of RushShelby Energy from Milroy. Readers with questions or comments can write to him in care of Electric Consumer, P.O. Box 24517, Indianapolis, IN 46224; or e-mail jackspaulding@hughes.net.
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